How to Handle your Chaos!
It is perfectly fine to lock yourself in a bathroom stall for a few minutes and try to compose yourself when you feel like you have lost control of your life. Whether you are a student, a business owner, a mother or a wife, I think we can all say that at one point or another our life is full of chaos. There are times where you may feel like your head is about to explode because you do not feel like you are in control, but I am here to tell you that it is alright to feel this way. I consider myself to be a very organized person. I try to keep my family’s schedule organized but there are times when I feel like I am drowning with things to do. Have you ever tried to fit working 9-5, gymnastics, a marriage counselling session, dinner and family time in one day? I have and its as hard as it sounds. Here are some tips that I use to reassure myself that my life is not falling apart.
1.BREATHE
Simple right. Try telling yourself to breathe when you feel your anxiety kicking in and you literally feel as if your lungs do not fill up with air so you end up panicking some more. This is what my anxiety feels like, I get nervous, worried and I cannot breath. I notice that this happens when I feel like I am not in control of a situation. It doesn’t happen often but I'v learned that when I do not feel in control or overwhelmed I need to remove myself for a few minutes and focus on my breathing. Taking some time to take a deep breathe sends a message to your brain to relax and allows you to think clearly. So the next time you have a toddler on your leg and the another child whining for attention, take a deep breath, say mommy needs to go to the bathroom and take that few minutes to breathe, this way mommy doesn’t make things worse by getting annoyed and yelling.
2.PRAY
Lord, I need you to give me the strength needed to take on the obstacles that this day may bring, AMEN. This is my daily prayer, seriously. It takes only a few minutes for you to meditate and ask God for guidance, strength, and a clear mind. I realized that the more complicated and busy my life gets the more I need Gods help. The bible says in Philippians 4:13 NIV, “ I can do ALL this through him who gives me strength,” so call on him when you need that peace of mind and that confirmation that you can handle this, he has already given you the strength to handle all things, but sometimes we need a little reminder. You can take some time for prayer on your drive in to work or on your drive to pick up the kids or on your drive in to school, as long as you find the time to connect with God you will feel so much better.
3.ASK FOR HELP
I have said this so many time throughout this blog and if you do not remember anything else from my posts I want you to remember this, “ASKING FOR HELP IS NOT A SIGN OF WEAKNESS.” I stand by this. You are not the only person who feels that your life is chaotic. There are so many women out here that have gone through what you are going through and are able to guide you in the right direction. Do not be scared to ask someone for help, you cannot do this alone. For those who see others struggling, do not withhold your advice. If you see someone struggling to get through a situation you have gone through before, HELP THEM OUT. It is our responsibility to help new moms prepare for their new life. It is our responsibility to help new wives be great wives. It is our responsibility to help children grow up and be successful. If we have the ability to change the world one woman at a time, why don’t we? So when someone is asking for help don’t tell them, “you’ll figure it out,” help them figure it out and if you can’t, connect them with someone who can.
My point in all of this is to tell you that, you are not alone. At some point in our lives we all feel out of control. This is not new, women have been feeling like this for years but social media has painted this perfect picture of what a “Boss Lady” can handle and makes it seem like women should be able to handle it all and not complain. Well guess what, I complain and its ok to complain, you’re human. However, after you complain stuff still needs to get done. I believe in order to handle your chaos you have to stop, breathe, pray and ask for help. Remember God will never put on you more than you can handle.
Let me know if this method has helped you out in any way or if you are using this method already. I would love to hear how you have implemented this in your life or if you have tips of your own you would like to share.
Love JO,
1.BREATHE
Simple right. Try telling yourself to breathe when you feel your anxiety kicking in and you literally feel as if your lungs do not fill up with air so you end up panicking some more. This is what my anxiety feels like, I get nervous, worried and I cannot breath. I notice that this happens when I feel like I am not in control of a situation. It doesn’t happen often but I'v learned that when I do not feel in control or overwhelmed I need to remove myself for a few minutes and focus on my breathing. Taking some time to take a deep breathe sends a message to your brain to relax and allows you to think clearly. So the next time you have a toddler on your leg and the another child whining for attention, take a deep breath, say mommy needs to go to the bathroom and take that few minutes to breathe, this way mommy doesn’t make things worse by getting annoyed and yelling.
2.PRAY
Lord, I need you to give me the strength needed to take on the obstacles that this day may bring, AMEN. This is my daily prayer, seriously. It takes only a few minutes for you to meditate and ask God for guidance, strength, and a clear mind. I realized that the more complicated and busy my life gets the more I need Gods help. The bible says in Philippians 4:13 NIV, “ I can do ALL this through him who gives me strength,” so call on him when you need that peace of mind and that confirmation that you can handle this, he has already given you the strength to handle all things, but sometimes we need a little reminder. You can take some time for prayer on your drive in to work or on your drive to pick up the kids or on your drive in to school, as long as you find the time to connect with God you will feel so much better.
3.ASK FOR HELP
I have said this so many time throughout this blog and if you do not remember anything else from my posts I want you to remember this, “ASKING FOR HELP IS NOT A SIGN OF WEAKNESS.” I stand by this. You are not the only person who feels that your life is chaotic. There are so many women out here that have gone through what you are going through and are able to guide you in the right direction. Do not be scared to ask someone for help, you cannot do this alone. For those who see others struggling, do not withhold your advice. If you see someone struggling to get through a situation you have gone through before, HELP THEM OUT. It is our responsibility to help new moms prepare for their new life. It is our responsibility to help new wives be great wives. It is our responsibility to help children grow up and be successful. If we have the ability to change the world one woman at a time, why don’t we? So when someone is asking for help don’t tell them, “you’ll figure it out,” help them figure it out and if you can’t, connect them with someone who can.
My point in all of this is to tell you that, you are not alone. At some point in our lives we all feel out of control. This is not new, women have been feeling like this for years but social media has painted this perfect picture of what a “Boss Lady” can handle and makes it seem like women should be able to handle it all and not complain. Well guess what, I complain and its ok to complain, you’re human. However, after you complain stuff still needs to get done. I believe in order to handle your chaos you have to stop, breathe, pray and ask for help. Remember God will never put on you more than you can handle.
Let me know if this method has helped you out in any way or if you are using this method already. I would love to hear how you have implemented this in your life or if you have tips of your own you would like to share.
Love JO,