Face it! In all honesty you either like spending time with your family or you don’t…extended family that is. You know who I mean; the aunts, uncles, cousins, grandmothers, grandfathers and those in between. In all reality whether you like spending time with them or not they are still considered your family and family plays a big part in everyone’s life. Now once you get married, his family becomes your family and vice versa which can either mean two things. Family gatherings just got bigger and louder or your time needs to be split more than what it already is. If your life is like mine the second option applies, but I have found a solution and friend I am willing to share my secret with you.
This secret that I am going to share with you is either going to make perfect sense or overwhelm you depending on the type of person you are. However, you won’t know until you try it. I have been doing this for 12 years and honestly it is the best way that has worked for me in getting both sides of the family together in one place! Are you ready for it…
Genius I know!
We just celebrated baby Aria’s 1st birthday so I thought this would be the perfect time to share my secret!
You have no idea how many times I have been told that I am crazy for throwing a birthday party every year for my children. At first, I started to believe it and question myself. Why do I put up with this every year instead of doing the milestone birthdays (you know 1, 5, 10 etc.)? Do the math! I have a 13-year-old, a 3-year-old and a 1 year old. That’s a lot of parties so wouldn’t you second guess yourself too? Nevertheless, here is my confession. I feel like I HAVE to do this, that it is my RESPONSIBILITY to do this in order to get everyone together. Being in an interracial relationship means families may have a language barrier and realistically learning a new language is not always possible so getting them together is difficult because it’s hard for them to interact with each other. That’s an excuse to me, if it means that 3 times a year I have a house full of 50-60 people trying to understand each other and converse loudly then so be it. If it means I will be asked about a 4th child in English and in Spanish more than twice then hey “NO” means the same thing in both languages.
Seriously, family is worth sacrificing for and it’s rewarding when you put your feelings aside and get them all together. Give them an opportunity to speak to each other and learn something new. It doesn’t have to be expensive, invite everyone over, order some pizzas and just enjoy each other. You have to be the anchor of the family. Do not worry about being a good host, that’s another excuse because I’m still learning. The more you do this the easier it gets, trial and error my friend, trial and error.
For my friends who do not have children yet, this works for you as well. Celebrate both of your birthdays and invite everyone over. Offer to host the holiday parties at your house, invite everyone over and have everyone bring a dish to make it easier on you. Family is important and no matter how old you are, you will always need them so make it a point to get everyone all together. Make it work for you, the important thing is that everyone is together.