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Severed Friendships; Can they be Salvaged?

4/10/2019

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​I don’t even know where to start so let’s start from the beginning.
 
I will be completely honest.I am not going to sit here and write about “How to be the world’s best friend” because to be completely transparent I don’t even know how I would even start that blog. I am okay with admitting that I have some work to do in this area of my life and that’s what brings me here. I have gone through some things recently that have led me to realized that I could have done better. I think the first step in mending relationships is to admit that you have some fault and you could have done better to keep the friendship healthy.
 
Some define friends as
  • People who are like family but are not blood.
  • People who are always around you.
  • People who you can tell your secrets to and no one else will ever find out.
  • People who you can always talk to and give you the best advice.
  • People who you can count on.
 
Does any of this sound familiar? Good. It’s important to know that everyone needs and defines a friend differently. However, the fact of the matter is that some of us fail to realize that those needs tend to change as we get older and we reach certain seasons in our lives. That’s what happened to me, lack of communication and time.
 
Within the past year, my life has been turned completely upside down and I had the opportunity to reflect where I currently am and my circle. I learned that it is ok to have friends for different areas of your life.  I have some who have known me for over 20 years that I can go to and talk about motherhood and life. Then I have other friends who are pastor wives that I can go to and get encouragement from when my spirit is low. The problem is, I’ve failed to realize that friendships need more than just text and conversation. Friendships need your time too, something that I have realized I am very selfish with. Unlike most people at my age I actually like being at home with husband and my kids but that’s no excuse.
 
Just like relationships, friendships can drift apart. Sometimes people out grow each other and other times they just wither away like a flower with no water. The question is can a friendship be salvaged? Yes. Does it happen overnight? No. Its take time, trust, communication and honestly. You should be able to go to one another and let them know exactly how you feel without fear of judgment, excuse or hurt feelings. You both should be able to admit that each of you had some fault and find a solution moving forward. Then when it’s all said and done you let it go and move on; never talking about it again and focusing on the new growth of your friendship.
 
 
The worst feeling in the world is when you are going through something and you literally feel like you have no one to talk to about it. I have gotten to that point before and I have also gotten to the point where I have had to rebuild 20+ years of friendship. Both situations are difficult to go through, so I hope I have shined some light on this for you. I personally understand that this is an area of opportunity for me and I am willing to work at it. Are you? I strongly believe that us women need to be surrounded by other strong women to lift each other up and to get through some tough stuff. So, lets grow together and vow that in 2019 its going to be the year where we give relationships our all. Our relationship with God, our spouses, our friends and our kids.
 
Let’s do it together,
 
Love Jo

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